Hurt feelings.

Maybe I’m just overly sensitive. I hate being petty about things.  But I just feel so left out lately.  My son is getting married in a couple of months. He had asked me to take their engagement/wedding pics.  Of course I told him yes. Well, apparently my work isn’t good enough for the bride’s mother. I love my son and his fiancee’ so I haven’t said anything because I don’t want to cause drama for them.  What really hurt me though was that my son didn’t even bother coming to me and explaining that his soon to be mother in law was going to hire someone else to take the photos.  I had to find out from overhearing a casual conversation my soon to be daughter in law was having with my sister. Once again, I have nothing against her. Her mother is very pushy and I know that my soon to be DIL just doesn’t want to have to deal with her attitude.  I was also supposed to take the fiancee’s senior pics. She had actually asked me for nearly a year to do them and of course I told her yes.  Well, when it came time for senior pics, she told me that her mom said that her daddy (her parents are divorced) had hired someone to do them.  Ok, fine. I knew it was pretty much her mom behind that but I didn’t say anything.  The woman who took those pics never gave them to her.  So instead of asking me, her mom hired someone else.  And I was going to do them for free. I took her and my son’s prom pics and I think they turned out good.  I’m not a professional and never claimed to be but I don’t think the hired people did any better.

Moving on to another thing that’s hurting my feelings. I told my sister months ago that if she and her current boyfriend got married, I didn’t really want to be in the wedding. I’d rather take the pictures.  She said ok. I guess she forgot all about that when he proposed last weekend.  He had a friend of his and his friend’s wife set things up and of course the friend’s wife has a “good camera”.  So she took pics of the proposal.  And I am guessing that’s who my sister is going to get to do the engagement and wedding photos.  Once again, this person is no better than I am with photography.  And I guess since my sister isn’t going to have me be the wedding photographer, she asked me to be in the wedding….I said yes, even though I don’t like being in weddings.

The bottom line is, my feelings are hurt. I realize it seems petty which is why I’m writing it here instead of venting to my son or my sister.  But petty or not, I still feel hurt.


I’ve been low carbing for about a month now. I have lost some weight and a few inches. And I feel a lot better than when I ate a ton of carbs. I tried to cut down to 20 carbs a day but that’s almost impossible. I try to eat no more than 30-35 though. That’s really good considering most people eat anywhere from 200-500 carbs per day. I don’t really miss any foods except maybe chips and salsa LOL.  But as far as bread goes, nah, not really.

I do get aggravated whenever I fix something specifically for me though and every one else wants some of it.  I mean they aren’t trying to lose weight so they can have carbs. In fact, my step daughter (21) is trying to gain weight.  So she can eat as much as she wants.  She has a high metabolism so she can eat twice what I do and only gain a lb.  But back to what I was saying.  I don’t mind sharing if you are low carbing it with me but do NOT eat my food, plus chips, cookies..etc.

I do have cheat days, usually on the weekends.  I over did it last weekend though. Instead of only eating tons of carbs on Saturday, I didn’t eat so good on Sunday either. So that kinda stalled my weight loss.  I was back in ketosis around Tuesday though.  And before anyone corrects me, ketosis is different from ketoacidosis. I do wish I could do strict low carb or keto, but I have to have a eating plan I can stick with.

I’m still mad about people eating my food though.

Random thoughts….

I’ve never been one who can just “cut” someone completely from my life. I suppose that’s why I give people so many chances. It’s why I can never understand how people can do it to me without explanation.  More often than not, the people I give unlimited chances to are people who have treated me far worse than I have ever treated them.  I have even reached out to people to apologize, even when I did nothing wrong.

What I have taken away from people who are like that is that they are so self-absorbed that they really don’t care about any one else’s feelings. If you don’t have anything to offer them, they are done with you.  If I have known someone for awhile, it’s difficult for me to walk away as if I never knew the person.  People seem to be able to do that to me so easily.


Get Out.

What kind of person complains and makes demands while they are living in someone else’s house for free? My 36 year old sister-in-law, that’s who.  I have no clue if she will read this, but if she does, then oh well.  I am to the point where I don’t care. We allowed her to move in so she could get a divorce. She told us that in order for her lawyer to agree to file the papers, she and her soon to be ex couldn’t reside in the same house.  She asked if she could stay here and we were under the impression it would only be for a month or so.  It’s now going on the 2nd month.  Meanwhile, she goes out to eat nearly every night and wastes gas going and getting her 14 year old daughter every other night from her soon to be ex’s house.  She demands that everyone cater to her troubled 14 year old daughter.  She tells everyone that they aren’t allowed to go back into “their” room (mind you, she doesn’t pay one cent to stay here) while Amy is here. She gets an attitude with my 4 yr old granddaughter if she goes back there.  Yes, my step daughter and her kids are living here again.  I help them out because hello, my stepdaughter is only 20. I give her a little more leniency. My sister in law is grown. I can’t help it because she hasn’t gotten her life together after all these years.  She might be able to keep a man if she didn’t complain all the time.  I know I’m complaining now but this is MY house.  There is only room for one alpha female and that’s me.

The latest thing that has me livid is the fact that she told my stepdaughter the other day that she was running late because my son kept her up all night.  Yes, he’s homeschooled and he’s a night owl. So. This is his home though. She’d better be glad she didn’t say anything directly to him. That’s all I’m going to say.  Another thing is that she told my stepdaughter is that she’d be glad when my oldest son got his stuff out of the other spare room so that my stepdaughter and her kids could have that room because she needed her space. Hell, you can have all the space you want OUTSIDE OF MY HOUSE!!  I mean the nerve of her.  She doesn’t pay a dime to stay here. She doesn’t buy groceries. She doesn’t even offer to pay the water bill.

She also tried to blame my 10 month old grandson (and also my husband) for her getting sick with the flu. For one, she has a different strand from my grandson and two, my husband has a sinus infection.  She works at a pharmacy so she probably picked it up there.  If she doesn’t hurry up and get out of my house, it’s gonna get ugly.  I know how I am. I will take so much crap and not say anything, but when I’ve had enough, I explode. And that’s never pretty.

Throw back to when I was pretty….


Senior Prom 1996.  Proof that I haven’t always been fat and that I used to be attractive.  Three kids and 40-50 lbs later, I don’t really feel that pretty anymore.  I’d love to look in the mirror and see this girl again.  But let’s be realistic. I was 17 and my metabolism was decent. Now it’s at a standstill. I’d be glad to just be down 20-30 lbs.

Oh and the guy in the picture? That’s my ex, my oldest son’s father. And yes, I am that short.  I’m 4’11” (I was probably around 4’10” in this photo) and he’s 6’2″-6’3′. I didn’t crop him out of the photo because, why? He was a part of my life at one time and I don’t hate him. I have fond memories of hanging out with him and just being the typical couple.  Things didn’t work out between us and that’s ok.  I do remember that he hated taking pictures LOL.  And I really can’t hate him because I see so much of him in my son.  It would almost like be hating my own child.

I also have photos somewhere of my first boyfriend and I going to prom. I may post those at another time.  I wasn’t as cute in those as I am in this one LOL.  I had my hair cut really short and was at that awkward teenage stage LOL.  To this day, my first boyfriend and I are still friends.  I don’t see why exes have to hate each other.  It never made much sense to me.  Things don’t work out and you move on to something better for you.  I know my ex in this photo doesn’t really care much for me and that’s ok.  I never knew why though. Ah..guess it’s just one of those things….

Stop Making Stupid People Famous

Why are we making a smart mouth, misbehaved child a celebrity? I know whoever reads this will know who I am talking about but I refuse to use her name or her infamous catch phrase.  I will admit, I found the Dr. Phil show amusing. I shared the memes on fb because at first, it was funny. However, the more I thought about it, I just couldn’t believe that a parent would let their child behave that way and not do something about it. Especially a 13 year old child.  I think I have it figured out though.  I honestly believe that this was all a ploy by the child’s mother to become famous. And it worked.  I watched both Dr. Phil shows. On the first, she acted like an exasperated mother who needed help for her out of control child.  It made for good TV. Then by the 2nd show, the mother was telling Dr. Phil that their episode was the highest rated one ever. Um, excuse me. You are proud of the fact that the show was so popular because your daughter acted like a skank?  That right there is exactly what is wrong with her daughter.  She has failed as a mother.

What really has me annoyed though is that some youtubers and a rap artist have collaborated with this child.  They have made videos with her and encouraged her behavior. Most of these youtubers are young adults.  A decent mother wouldn’t have even entertained the idea of allowing their 13 year old daughter to hang out with these people. I’ve also heard the girl is going to not only going to get her own tv show, but also get paid 40K to make an appearance at a rap festival in Miami. I don’t know why some people idolize her. I’ve seen the videos she’s posted on instagram and if my daughter ever did anything like that, she would be grounded until she was 30!  I’ve also read that her father has been in a custody battle with the child’s mother since 2004.  He also pays child support. I think he’s trying to get full custody of her from her mom. I feel sorry for his wife and kids. That girl will pull them apart.  If he gets custody, he needs to send her to a boot camp for troubled kids and straighten her out.

I know I sort of got away from the original point but I think it’s ridiculous that our country makes stupid people famous. People who are famous for nothing.  If you’re going to be famous, please have a talent other than being a mouthy, idiotic, disrespectful teenager.